I can't breathe

I hate not being able to breathe.  I cannot sleep anymore because I am afraid I will quit breathing.  I go Tuesday to the doctor that specializes in my chest area.  We are hoping they will do the scope thing Friday of next week.  The breathing doctor told me that I have scar tissue in my Trach so I hope the chest doctor will laser it off when they do the scope thing.  I feel like I am drowning in water.  I hate the feeling of suffocating.  I just hope they can fix it.  I hope that I do not have to breath like this for now on.  I just hope they can find a cure to my breathing problem.  My mom had to sleep with me because I am afraid I will quit breathing during the night.  She is going to sleep with me until they fix my breathing.  We are all afraid I will quit breathing in my sleep.  I hate it.  I cannot sleep anymore either.  I can only sleep till about 10 or 11 now.  I was sleeping until noon, 1 or 2.  I hope I can sleep more when they fix my breathing.  My mom put her breathing machine on me this morning.  I could breathe better with it on because it was giving me constant air.  I need one of those.  She quits breathing in her sleep she has sleep apnea.  So she has to have a breathing machine.  It helped a lot.  That is what I have asking them to take me to the ER so they will put me on oxygen.  So I least I have a fix for my breathing for now.  At least I can breathe when I need the air.  I just wish that Tuesday would hurry up and get here.